Betrayed by those I trust.. why?

I don't understand why I seem to be the target of constant deceit and betrayal. I am not a victim by any means, however it just seems that when shyt goes ary I am the target for it. My co-star (who has been MIA) and I are shooting today. Some friends in the business (which I introduced all of them) went to the AVN's in Vegas this past weekend. Well I found out today they all went together. I DIDN'T GO BECAUSE I HAD NO ONE TO GO WITH!! WTF? Do I have the right to be upset? I mean no one said anything to me about officially going. And co-star Donovan lied to me about why he has to postpone our shoot til Sunday instead of coming up Friday. So I am really hurt by all this.

So we are here shooting, and my mood is pretty down. I did go to the club last night and ran into a bunch of ghosts of the past. You know, the guys who I haven't seen in forever and ones who still haven't got the goods. LOL @ still ain't got it. I am TOO old for the clubs... and if you haven't gotten my attention THIS long you ain't about to get it now.

Ok, let me get back to shooting. I want my goody goody dick... and wish HE would let me film us cuz that shyt is never bad and he makes me feel so good. He rubs my face, puts his fingers in my hair... just a real cool guy. Too bad there is no potential to settle down even tho I am not ready for a committment. I like him tho, he makes me smile. Thanks HR... you know who you are. :)




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