Sunday, September 6, 2009

Time to unplug for a while

I had gotten back into the swing of things... and then a crap load of bs came my way. As a result I have simply decided to unplug from being "Platinum Puzzy" my alter ego and spend some time as just "Kari"... After coming to some very heart breaking realizations, disappointing set backs and discovering some shocking fakes in this business... I think this is a much needed break. This also comes after having gone through all of my receipts for this year and realizing how much money I have tossed into my sites, my tour and various other business expenses that aren't paying off as quickly as I would have hoped. Well... they are, but the truth is when you go through moments like this where other models start calling you a stalker simply because you ask to shoot content exchange with them, or ones that you thought would have treated you just a lil bit better turn on you - then you just get to this fuck it stage and rather than call people out by name, or start a bunch of drama - this becomes my que to simply take a deep breath, break away and do some deeper reflecting. You can tell by my recent posts that I have been battling with a depression NOT within my REAL life but as the alter ego "Platinum Puzzy" faces the possibility of extinction. With the silent rejections of production teams and companies, to models turning me down... I have analyzed everything from changing my name to wondering if I have "what it takes" to survive in this shark tank. 5yrs is a nice run, and considering the tribulations I have overcome, I am not complaining at all. But this is a huge decision, and for the lil bit of food its producing, and the lil bit of work being "charity" tossed my way ... I have to truly execute a decision in the best interest of me, the person behind "Platinum Puzzy".

I got offered a VERY nice job offer as well, so that makes it REAL tough to stay when things are REALLY bad right now. And if I hear ONE more person tell me it's RECESSION related, I am going to punch someone. I know the recession is effecting a ton of folks right now... however these PEOPLE who refuse to professionally reject me instead of simply IGNORING me can have the COMMON courtesy to email me and advise their lack of interest. That's all I ask. Especially when they spent the time pressing me about sending pictures, and I did as I was asked... "Thanks, but no thanks" would be sufficient for me.

On top of everything else, I have had ZERO love life since the beginning of this year and that includes private encounters with someone of the opposite sex for purpose other than business. It's time I start dating and getting out. I spend ALOT of time on here trying to better "Platinum" and the sites... Time I should be spending with someone special. Time I have spent entertaining the free loaders and bug-a-boo's who are more demanding than the FANS who actually PAY for my time, videos, and work. Being TOO available is definitely coming to an abrupt end. Aside from that, I'm not getting any younger and life is too short to be "sewing my oats" just to end up alone... Reality is I'm not as successful as I would like to be, and on this track I never will be. I hate that this post sounds so negative, its just real. My true feelings on what I am going through right now and the emotions I am experiencing. I want more than anything to find the answer that makes ALL of this better, and I won't have to retire or lay Miss Platinum to rest. Maybe some time off will equivilate to a balanced answer and solution.

So, until next time = IF and when that may be, Ciao. For those who have been here all along, or simply just been loyal to me... THANK YOU VERY MUCH. For the few of you who I can honestly say HAVE BEEN THERE, fans, models, producers, etc. and you know who YOU are... thank you. For those of you that fall in the other categories, I wish you the best... and GET IT TOGETHER will ya? "Everyone deserves an answer, even if its not the one they want." real talk.

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